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A Key to Work Life Balance: Effective Communication |
Guys...lets face it, we are not the best communicators in the world. Am I right? How many times has your spouse made this very point?
All right...here's the deal...I'm going to help you create a few habits in your life to regain the incredibly valuable asset of communication. Why is this so important? Because this is a vital part of our quest for work-life-balance.
When we effectively communicate to our spouses, we fill up their tank, gain their buy-in to our businesses and careers and ultimately bring about a stronger relationship.
Here are four steps to gaining the communication asset:
1) Commitment - You must both be committed to working together on effective communication . It takes 2 to make this work. Make sure you both understand the reason this is important, and make a commitment to each other for your business's sake and for the sake of your marriage.
2) Set aside Daily 1on 1 time - Now this may be difficult for some of you and yes, I have heard a million excuses, why people can't do this, but when people implement this little discipline into their lives, they are amazed at the results. Here is what I want you to do. Each day, when you walk in the door, kiss the spouse, kiss the kids, and then sit down with your spouse on the couch. Tell the rug rats that are tugging at your leg, that this is mommy and daddy time and that you will talk to them in a few minutes.
Now, for the next 15 minutes...talk about your days. Be an active and focused listener!
This is not a time for you to solve all the problems one of you may be facing. This is for you entrepreneurs...you may solve problems all day long, but your spouse may not be looking for your all-knowing insight. He or she may just want to talk and have you listen. I know! Crazy isn't it? That someone with a problem may not want your answers to their problems?
Simply talk about what is going on at work, home, family, school, whatever. What has you excited today? What has you down? Are you worried? Are you stressed...Why? Talk, for 15 minutes and don't allow any distractions.
Now, this may seem like a simple and logical thing to do, but you will be amazed at the results, when you are fully committed. I have coached many people through this little exercise and one of the most incredible results is the impact it will have on your kids. I've even had a number of people say that since implementing this exercise that their kids are finally sleeping through the night! Why would this impact your kids you ask? Because they simply want to see that mommy and daddy love each other and actually enjoy talking. This brings an amazing sense of security to children and shows them how important quality communication really is. This is what's called becoming Family Focused.
3) Take time to reflect - Now, I am not suggesting by any means that the communication should stop at this point, but you can get off the couch now and get on with life. It's important that you have some time to reflect individually on what was said. Maybe you have some good insight into what he said? Maybe you have additional questions about something? Once you have had some time to reflect, you may have a much more productive and effective next conversation, lets say at dinner...or while talking in bed. Trust me, pillow talk becomes much more fun after the business talk is done!
4) Support each other and be decisive- don't procrastinate - Entrepreneurs by nature make decisions and act quickly on those decisions. The point here is to have effective communication surrounding decisions and to support each other's decisions. You may not agree with all decisions, but at least you now have perspective and have effectively communicated about the topic and can support each other in that particular area. This allows the spouse to have insight and a say in your business or career, and allows the entrepreneur insight and a say into the life of the family.
If your spouse does not know what's going on with you at work, then it's really hard to bring true "balance" to the work life balance initiative. He or she starts to speculate and imagine the worst. Don't give them any reason to do this. Implement these simple steps to avoid the speculation.
The sharing of information can become effective communication and ultimately dedication to each other and the business.
Write me and let me know how it goes.
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